The worst of Malayalam songs: 8 lyrics we wish had never been written

How do you define the outrageous lyric? These songs are coined without much thought, the only intention being to rustle up a rhyme. They will be as memorable as they are offensive to the ears and mind, and often just as hilarious... Mostly unplanned.

Here, we bring you a list of such hapless attacks on the rhyming word in the name of creativity in Malayalam cinema. In exactly this order.

1. ‘Pineapple penne chocolate piecey’ (Vellinakshathram)

In this high-octane dance number in the rain featuring Prithviraj and Karthika, the hero begins by equating her with pineapple and chocolate, begging her to spare him the agonising twist of love. And yes, the rest of it is just as hilarious.

2. ‘Chocolateu poleyulla ee urunda meni’ (Chocolate)

What’s our lyricist’s obsession with chocolate women? And poor Prithviraj is yet again the bearer of this unbearable song. As the two leads challenge each other in this song, the hero describes her body as round and brown as a chocolate and threatens to slice it delicately into pickled mangoes. Such creativity (not)!

3. ‘Kalla kalla kochu kalla’ (Youth Festival)

The boy and girl declare undying love to each other in this song with terrible choreography. The girl says he is that thief with dashing looks who stole her heart and the boy reciprocates with equally appropriate lyrics.

4. ‘Hello hello Mr. Romeo Master’ (Rajaputhran)

Try picking at least one stanza in this entire lyrical whiplash that makes sense. Romeo master, romantic star, girl jumping into danger… No, wait try this—“streaking moodil streaking paadum Micheal Jackson njan.” Assault on our senses.

5. ‘Baggy jeansum’ (Sainyam)

Even if one tries to evaluate it for its cool quotient, the lyrics are totally inane and go haywire with the awkward choreography. That the song writer is a fan of Pooja Bhatt is what strikes us first and then the fixation with baggy jeans, shoes that sums up one’s cool quotient. Add words like liberalisation, fair revolution friction and you get rest of the fallen puzzle pieces.

6. ‘Ishtamalleda Enikshitamallada (Swapnakoodu)

Talk about absolute creativity. It’s basically a friendly verbal pow-wow. She brushes him off and he is persistent with his wooing. In other words, plain and simple ‘get lost’ gets tangled up rather unpoetically. Of course, Meera Jasmine’s over-the-top acting adds salt to the wound.

7. ‘Dekho Simple magic’ (Indraprastham)

The marvels of the internet couldn’t be more pitiably expressed. It’s that rare song where everything goes wrong—choreography, lyrics, music, sets.

8. ‘Mazha Peyannu' (Red Chillies)

We think the lyrics were rustled up on the sets and it was a rainy day. So they threw a few words here and there, marking rain in red ink and began the assault. The second rare song where everything went horribly wrong.

This article was first published on Fullpicture.in. The News Minute has syndicated the content. You can read the original article here.