An open letter to victims of an international conspiracy

Revathi Pogadadanda
An open letter to victims of an international conspiracy
An open letter to victims of an international conspiracy
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I am a 33-year-old, successful, patriotic and rational Indian woman who can sympathise with how violated you are all feeling with the documentary which has been made by a British woman, to degrade our culture! How terrible! Who the hell is she to violate our space? 

Before I get into a little more victim crying and breast beating, I have a few points of my own. Guess all those great scholars and patriots will be able to agree with me on the same. 

So our greatest problem with the documentary is - Indian men have been generalised. Oh, yes generalisation - I know this word, like the dark-skinned-oh-so-South-Indian back of my hand. In late 90s, I have seen lots of Indians migrating to US, UK, Canada or any nation where Indians were generalised as the "the real IT brains". I know am deviating from the topic but can't help sharing this joke - a genius IT professional lands himself at a very prestigious IT company and started to search the entire keyboard for 'any key' as the computer asked him to press "any key".

Anyway, he was still retained because he is "a genius Indian" - a generalisation we don't want to complain about.

As I mentioned earlier, am almost an authority on generalisation considering am a Indian woman. Let me throw some more light on it - we are that clan 

- who can't drive (forget who gets maximum driving challans),
- the weaklings (ignore that we have international medal winning weightlifting/boxing champions, also ignore that we lift full gas cylinders/carry water for miles together and can put up with loads of nonsense with a smile), 
- who spend off husband's money and use him as a credit card (a lot of my friends and I have been financially independent for as long as I can think...but fall into the same category)
- who toture husbands, take their freedom away (haven't you read all those 'oh so humorous jokes about women' whatsapped every single hour?)
- who sit and gossip and watch soaps, and goes shopping everyday (oh yeah, housework happens magically)
- burden on the families (sigh!)

The list can get bafflingly long but am sure you are intelligent enough and got the drift. I can understand how painful it must be for the men to be generalised. But am also sure, they are strong enough to over come it. After all, they are stronger than women!!!

My next problem with the documentary is - it is made by those demonic Britishers who made our lives miserable. She is also one of them. All of them. They 'all' ruled us. No, no that can't be called a generalisation - didn't they rule us for 200 years? And now that German professor denied our male students internships. The greatest fear, I hear from intelligent men around is - this will not stop here, all countries will follow suit. No, not generalising again!

My third and most important problem with the documentary is - how can a lady from UK with fifth most 'reported' sexual crimes on woman, talk about us. Basically, since 'per capita rape' is so low here, we should wait till we reach the admissible standards and then talk about rapes here. By the way - what is the accepted standard of rape for reporting? Am sure all those intelligent people can elucidate. I have read on Wikipedia a few weeks ago that - in the past 60 years, there is a staggering 873% increase in rapes being 'reported' in the country. Also, in the last decade there is a 386% increase in 'reported' rapes on children. Am sure, at this amazing growth rate of abuse, we will beat any standard, very soon. We can probably allow this documentary to be aired in a couple of years. But, am reminded of a Telugu proverb here, which loosely translates into - if our gold is good, why blame the goldsmith. So, if our woman stop reporting abuse problem will be solved automatically. Is it not?

Also, since we are discussing reporting standards, as a patriot I feel the necessity to put forth more guidelines -

- no more coverage on rapes and sexual abuse as our per capita rape rate is low.
- no coverage on terrorism, naxalism or extremism in our country anymore as we have less number of lives lost compared to the total population. Aren't there countries like Pakistan and Afganistan leading with such crimes?
- no more reportage on any kind of poverty. Only 21.9 % of the population is below the poverty line, as per the latest RBI reports.
- no more coverage on calamities like earthquakes, cyclones, tsunamis. Our risk of natural disaster is just 7.7%, way too less when compared to Vanuatu (36.43%), Tonga (28.23%), Philippines (27.52%) and a hoarde of other countries.
- no coverage of medical emergencies like Ebola, swine flu, bird flu, AIDS - any of it. None of it originated in our nation! 
- nothing on pollution, none on population, not even fashion or cinemas. We are not leading in any of it!

Am sure, you agree with me on this and there is a lot to add to this list. We are patriots and don't want any bad publicity.

Finally, dear daughter of UK, don't even dare to take interviews of our rapists by bribing the jail authorities and corrupting our fool proof system. Don't even dare to talk about our lives. Frankly, how dumb are you to not get it - if we thought it was wrong, why would it exist in our sacred nation of women worshippers?

And dear patriots - I totally understand the pain and agony you are going through. Am with you.

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