When Nilambur MLA PV Anwar speaks, it rains theories. The MLA's PVR Water Theme Park is facing a host of allegations, from violating waste management guidelines to functioning without the necessary permissions from the local panchayat.
The Forest Department is also conducting a probe about a check dam which has allegedly been built illegally for the park. To add to Anwar's sea of troubles, the Pollution Control Board withdrew the sanction given to the park located at Kakkadampoyil in Malappuram district.
At a press meet, PV Anwar attempted to wash away the questions by talking about...Japan and Japanese people.
Don't ask us why.
Taking off at a tangent, the MLA started talking about the Japan-aided water project which was started in Kerala in 2003 to benefit the people of five districts.
Asking why Japan was aiding Kerala for a water project, Anwar made some rather startling declarations that might overturn any present understanding of Geography, Meteorology, and Politics that you have.
"There is a Japan water project here. Who is giving the money for this? It is Japan!" said PV Anwar dramatically.
Without diluting PV Anwar's originality with further comments, let's hear it from the man himself.
"Why are the people in Japan interested in making the people of Kerala drink water? This is where you have to understand. The monsoon clouds from the Western Ghats travel to Japan and make it rain there. They get drinking water because of the monsoon clouds from the Western Ghats. So what is Japan's need? The forests here must increase! Only then the people there will get water. That is the understanding," he said.
PV Anwar then went on to say that it was for Japan's sahebs to get water that all water was being released to the Arabian sea.
"Only then will the water evaporate and form monsoon clouds! And the clouds have to go to Japan! That's why this money is being spent," said the MLA.
Yes, we know this is all a bit too much to swallow. Sit down and drink a glass of water before the Japanese demand it for their monsoon clouds.
The MLA's fanciful theories have opened the floodgates on the Internet for troll memes and videos.